Bite Somebody · Bite Somebody Else · Sara Dobie Bauer

Creating the Romantic Lead in Bite Somebody Else: Lord Nicholas

As I’ve made abundantly clear, Bite Somebody Else did not exist in my brain until World Weaver Press signed me for two books. At first, it was a scramble to think of a plot … which was when I realized I was doing things backwards. I didn’t need the plot of Imogene’s love story first. I needed the romantic lead. But WHO would Imogene fall in love with? I was clueless.

Help arrived in the shape of my gorgeous husband. While bemoaning the mystery of an Imogene love connection, he made a suggestion. Knowing I’m obsessed with Benedict Cumberbatch, my husband said, “Why don’t you just base the romantic lead on him?”

Well, that was just silly. I told my husband to leave the writing to the professionals … until I realized he was exactly right. (I hate when he’s right.)

As proven via her actions in Bite Somebody, the character of Imogene is uncouth, irreverent, disrespectful, and totally homicidal. Mr. Cumberbatch is posh, British, disturbingly polite, and … pretty much the complete opposite of Imogene. Which, in romantic comedy, is the perfect personality cocktail.

When creating a love match (in fiction and in life), there have got to be differences and similarities. For instance, my husband is really good at cleaning our house; I am not. We’re both huge Harry Potter nerds, though, so we’re obviously perfect for each other.

In Bite Somebody Else, Imogene and Lord Nicholas Christopher Cuthbert III are hugely different people HOWEVER they both love to dance. Dancing is, in fact, what brings them together in the first place.  (They also both love sex and blood, which makes for some vamptacular uber-passion.)

They’ve got the romance thanks to their similarities, but they’g got the comedy thanks to their differences. Nicholas might think Imogene is beautiful, but he also thinks she’s a maniac. Pretty sure this is Nicholas’s permanent expression in Bite Somebody Else:

And yet, it works, because their disagreements and their banter build a magic equation of character chemistry. My husband, for example, thinks it’s insane that I enjoy the sound of him singing off-key. I think it’s funny that he find me adorable in mismatched pajamas. (I look like a homeless person in the morning.)

Love is less about the perfect stuff and more about the awkward fumbles, adorable idiosyncrasies, and shared moments of extreme embarrassment.

Once I had Nicholas, I had the plot to Bite Somebody Else. The story wrote itself once this ancient British vampire showed up, and I have my hubby to thank. (The book is dedicated to him, after all.)

According to my editor at World Weaver Press, Imogene needed a love story. With Bite Somebody Else running rampant around the world, she now has one, as does once-lonely Lord Nicholas. What is it they say? Love is love, baby, even between a twisted 80s-obsessed vampire and her 350-year-old blood-sucking Mr. Manners.

Get your copy of Bite Somebody Else today:

     

Bite Somebody · Bite Somebody Else · Sara Dobie Bauer

Bite Somebody Else is out TODAY

My dog woke me up this morning because she was so excited about Bite Somebody Else. Okay, not really, but she did whack me in the face with her big ass and try to squish my head. Same thing, right? I, for one, am very excited to unleash Imogene and Nicholas upon the world. I may look calm, but inside, I’m like …

Today, Bite Somebody Else will be arriving in people’s mailboxes and Kindles, and my plan of world domination will be complete. … Um, I mean, my plan to make you laugh will be complete. Yeah, that’s what I meant.


About Bite Somebody Else:

Imogene helped her newbie vampire friend Celia hook up with an adorable human, but now Celia has dropped an atomic bomb of surprise: she has a possibly blood-sucking baby on the way. Imogene is not pleased, especially when a mysterious, ancient, and annoyingly gorgeous vampire historian shows up to monitor Celia’s unprecedented pregnancy.

Lord Nicholas Christopher Cuthbert III is everything Imogene hates: posh, mannerly, and totally uninterested in her. Plus, she thinks he’s hiding something. So what if he smells like a fresh garden and looks like a rich boarding school kid just begging to be debauched? Imogene has self-control. Or something.

As Celia’s pregnancy progresses at a freakishly fast pace, Imogene and Nicholas play an ever-escalating game of will they or won’t they, until his sexy maker shows up on Admiral Key, forcing Nicholas to reveal his true intentions toward Celia’s soon-to-arrive infant.


What the cool kids think …

“Raunchy and irreverent, BITE SOMEBODY ELSE is a vampire romp oozing with sexual tension and laugh-out-loud surprises.” – Beth Cato, author of the Clockwork Dagger series

“Funny, sexy, and whip-smart, BITE SOMEBODY ELSE is a hilarious ride through the trials of vampire romance and what it means to be your own hero … and still fall for the swoony British guy.” – The Novel Novice

“In BITE SOMEBODY ELSE, Bauer concocts a devilish brew that’s one part What We Do In the Shadows and one part She’s Having a Baby. If you loved the charm and wit of Bite Somebody, its sequel is sure to intoxicate!” – E. Catherine Tobler, author of the Folley & Mallory series

“Chock full of unparalleled wit, the most unexpected and stupidly adorable love connection ever, and Imogene’s signature miniskirts, BITE SOMEBODY ELSE will have you laughing from cover to cover!” – Tiffany Michelle Brown, author of Give It Back


THEME SONG!!!!!!

You can rock out to the full Bite Somebody Else soundtrack on Spotify.


I think it’s very important to your happiness that you buy a copy of Bite Somebody Else right now, so don’t hesitate.

    

And reviewing is caring. (Damn, that didn’t rhyme.) Anyway, if you like Bite Somebody Else, review it and tell all your friends! Now, I’m going to go drink a rum punch with Imogene. Don’t look at me like that. She’s a real person. Didn’t you know?

Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Bite Somebody Else · Music · Ohio · Sara Dobie Bauer

The Bite Somebody Else Soundtrack

As you know, Imogene loves to dance. She loves music. She should basically have wireless earbuds surgically attached to her head. Of course she needs a soundtrack. Well, Bite Somebody Else needs a soundtrack … and here it is. (For you Spotify people, find the fun HERE.)


PRESENTING THE RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING
BITE SOMEBODY ELSE
SOUNDTRACK OF AWESOMESAUCE

1. “Don’t Stop Me Now” by Queen

I love Freddie. Imogene loves Freddie. Plus, she doesn’t want to be told what to do. And she is a “sex machine ready to reload.” Personally, I used to rock out to this tune in my friend’s car on the way to high school, smoking our illicit cigarettes before choir practice. Imogene would approve.

2. “Elastic Heart” by Sia

Not only do I picture Imogene and Nicholas having an epic dance-off to this kick ass song, but it fits Imogene’s persona perfectly. She’s got thick skin, and she bounces back from bad stuff. She’s a tough cookie. I wish I was a bit more elastic myself.

3. “Africa” by Toto

I tend to dance around my house with this song at full volume to annoy my husband. Nicholas similarly uses this song to annoy Imogene in Bite Somebody Else. I’m not saying my husband and I are a lot like Nicholas and Imogene, but … hmm, maybe we are.

4. “Sunglasses at Night” by Corey Hart

Imogene wears her red, plastic 80s sunglasses all the time to shield her glamour powers and to look cool. She unleashes said glamour powers in Bite Somebody Else big time, so watch out!

5. “Alone” by Heart

Ah, the height of 80s hair band angst! This, my darlings, is the love song of Imogene and Nicholas. For both of them: “Till now, I always got by on my own / I never really cared until I met you!” Oh, the gnashing of teeth and face-melting guitar! Swoon!

6. “The Mating Game” by Bitter:Sweet

First off, I want to see Nicholas enter a room adjusting his cufflinks in slow motion to this song. I don’t know why. Secondly, for the entirety of Bite Somebody Else, Imogene and Nicholas are playing a game. They’re playing each other. Who will win, hmm?

7. “Come on Eileen” by Dexy’s Midnight Runners

A classic wedding dance song, played at the nuptials of one Celia and Ian. Makes me hop around the room. I dare you to stand still when this one’s on full blast.

8. “Space Oddity” by David Bowie

Just like my love for Freddie, I also love Bowie, as does Imogene. This tune is part of Nicholas’s slow seduction of our purple-haired heroine. I don’t know why I find this song so soothing, by the way. It’s about a man in a spaceship, and I’m claustrophobic.

9. “Turning Page” by Sleeping at Last

Oh, the irony!!!! This is from one of the Twilight movies, and I love it. Really, though, it’s sort of melancholy and lovely. Plus, it’s about a guy who’s waited a hundred years to find the woman he loves, and Nicholas has been waiting for, like, a million. It’s perfect! Just try not to picture Edward and Bella.

10. “Under Pressure” by Queen and David Bowie

Two worlds collide! Freddie and Bowie in one song! Genius. I’ve had a soft spot for this song since two of my best gal pals in Charleston made this their karaoke tune. In Bite Somebody Else, everyone is under a lot of pressure, especially Imogene who will do just about anything to avoid falling in love with a guy who’s perfect for her.


Bite Somebody Else will be released Tuesday, June 20th. Pre-order your copy from World Weaver Press. If you’re in the Ohio area, I’d love to see you at one of my upcoming launch parties: Toledo and Cleveland. Until then, dance, you mad things, DANCE!

(Again, for you Spotify people, find the fun HERE.)

Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Charleston · Mental Health · Sara Dobie Bauer · Writing

Light and Scales: Freaky Friday Fiction

There are people out there who would have you believe love cures mental illness. Find the right guy or girl, and your depression will go away. Your monsters will go away. Fact is, no one can heal you but YOU. Be wary of thinking otherwise …

Light and Scales (Excerpt)
by Sara Dobie Bauer
Featured in Twisted Sister Magazine

You meet him your second day in Charleston. More so, perhaps, you meet his violin. He’s wearing a suit you imagine cost as much as a car. As he speaks to you, he’s still holding his violin: a red piece of wood with scratch marks and a faded veneer. You wonder at the abuse the instrument has taken but soon think these are not marks of abuse but marks of love—of devotion.

You’re in a place called the Charleston Grill. Waiters scurry like albino beetles in white shirts and dark slacks. The restaurant smells of butter and fish but mostly butter.

After the jazz quintet finishes their last set, you find out his name is Graydon Kelly and he would like to take you to dinner. At first, you think you should say no. He has that look about him: the thorn on the rose, the sugared rim of a poisoned glass.

When he shows up to your date, though, you reassess. He’s in a pastel linen button-down and torn jeans. He has on boat shoes, and his curly black hair is a mess. He smells like pine.

“Rosin,” he explains. Something to do with his violin.

He takes your hand and leads you to a table in the courtyard. His left hand is callused against yours. Outside, winding, wrestling fig vines grow up the exterior wall, illuminated by white twinkle lights that mimic the stars. He pulls out your chair and sighs into his seat.

He must notice you looking at him, because he smiles. “I look different when I’m not on stage.”

You fall into conversation, and it’s not the usual, polite, getting to know you babble. Graydon Kelly says odd, irresponsible things like, “You seem like you’re running from something” or “You have an amazing mouth” or the worst, “What do you think of me exactly?”

You only respond to the last comment: a terse, “I’m not sure.”

He walks you home in a rainstorm, leaving you both soaked on the crooked front porch of the yellow plantation house you rent. He smells like rain and marinara sauce with the lingering touch of pine. He tastes like tiramisu.

Later, in your bed, you find him conversational. He makes himself at home. He is comfortable with pillow talk, even with an almost stranger. Again, you doubt your assessments.

He seemed so dangerous in his dark suit at Charleston Grill but so playful in his boat shoes with his messy hair: almost innocent. His comfort in your bed, though, is his tell, his admission. He does this all the time. He makes love to women he doesn’t know because they ask him to, because of his violin and his face and the strange questions he spouts over champagne.

When you ask about a white scar on his rib cage, he tells you his father used to beat him. One day, his father broke his ribs. One poked through the skin. In Graydon’s words, the bone looked like “a stick dipped in marmalade.”

His honesty makes you awkward. You feel a need to share something, too, so you tell him you’ve been diagnosed schizophrenic. He doesn’t know what this means, not really, so you explain to him that you see things sometimes—children in white light on sidewalks; grown men covered in red scales. You tell him things have been better since the medication …

Read the rest today at Twisted Sister Literary Magazine.

Bite Somebody · Bite Somebody Else · Modeling · Sara Dobie Bauer

The Bite Somebody Else Photo Shoot

I do love a warm blood bath. To prepare for this spectacular homage to the Bite Somebody series, I didn’t drink any blood for weeks! Some brave folks got close enough to snap pictures, but … well, I may have taken a couple little bites. Imogene would approve.

Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Photo by Steph Gentry.
Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Photo by Bill Thornhill.
Photo by Steph Gentry.
Photo by Bill Thornhill.

In case you didn’t notice, June is the birthday month of Bite Somebody Else. The second and final book in the Bite Somebody series comes out June 20th. If you haven’t pre-ordered your copy from World Weaver Press, what are you waiting for? Click HERE for more info.

Finally, a shout out to the amazing people who made this photo shoot happen. Blood bath bombs by Ocean Bubbles Bath and Body. (They smell soooooo good!) Photographs by Bill Thornhill and Steph Gentry. Hair and makeup by Megan Lacy Sullivan. (I love you guys. So much.) Here’s a shot of us being ridiculous behind the scenes. Megan is hiding, Steph is fixing my bra, and Bill is having an all right time.

Sara Dobie Bauer · Writing

Underlanders: When the world ends …

When the world ends, I’ll be sitting on my back porch with a bottle of scotch, toasting the zombies on their way to eat me. I don’t see myself as much of an apocalyptic fighter. (I mean, how do you expect me to live without Netflix?) However, some people are fighters: namely, the people in my new short story, “Underlanders,” featured in Arizona State’s literary magazine Canyon Voices. Here’s a teaser …

“Underlanders:” An Excerpt
By Sara Dobie Bauer
Published in Canyon Voices

Marie found her boys in the library, where they rested in all manner of recline. Tiny sat in the large, leather desk chair, with a book in his hands. The other boys sat on couch cushions and cafeteria seats. Some were on the ground—others stood in corners—but they all listened as Tiny stuttered through the rhyme of “The Raven.”

Marie listened to the words, but she also listened to the sounds of the abandoned hospital at night. She knew what sounds were welcome—the settling of the building, rain against windows, boys shuffling to the restroom. She knew sounds that were not: heavy, adult footsteps; the slamming of doors; inhuman growls. She heard none of these noises, nothing at all, and yet, the stranger suddenly arrived at her side.

He said, “I’ve always loved Poe.”

The boys turned. Shippy was the first to stand up, squint, and point. “Did you hear him talk? He is James Bond!”

Voices surrounded the stranger as he walked to the stacks of books, arranged in messy piles on heavy, metal bookcases that covered the windows and walls. She noticed he walked with no sound.

Yellow stood behind Shippy and shouted, “Can he stay? Will he stay, Mother?” His blond head shined silver.

Marie was too busy watching the stranger to respond. She could see his eyes change. From cold, dark blue, his eyes began to shine. He reached out long, pale fingers and took hold of a battered volume of William Shakespeare. She thought she saw his hand shake, and his eyes watered.

“Where did you get all these?” He put the book under his nose and sniffed.

“People left them behind.”

Then, Shippy ran to the stranger’s side—out of character for a boy taught to trust no one. “Are you really James Bond? You are, aren’t you?”

The stranger ran his thumbs over the picture of Shakespeare’s face. He glanced at Marie before looking down at the boy who needed glasses. “Yes, I am.”

“I knew it!”

The sad hospital library erupted in sound, but Marie hushed them until the room was silent.

“Would you read to us?”

“Tiny, the man needs to rest,” she said.

“No, I …” The stranger rubbed his eyes. “I would love to.”

“Can he, Mother? Please?”

Marie nodded.

“Do we call you Mr. Bond or double-oh-seven or—”

“James is fine.” He put his hand on Shippy’s head as he walked past the boy. Tiny vacated the desk chair and gestured with dusty hands. The other boys returned to their states of recline, but their eyes were bright. Unaccustomed to a new voice, they waited. They were the most patient group of children in the history of Earth, and they remained that way, frozen.

(Read the whole story at ASU’s Canyon Voices HERE. I promise nothing bad happens …)

 

 

Bite Somebody · Bite Somebody Else · Sara Dobie Bauer

Vivian’s Boots: A Bite Somebody Short

Originally featured as part of Literary Escapism‘s “Hidden Treasures” series, here’s a quick note from host Jackie …

My longtime readers should know by now that I love the mini-fiction events; a glimpse into the world, a story by a beloved side character, or an introduction to never before seen action.

I’m hosting Rust City Book Convention here in the Metro Detroit area, and to help spotlight the authors attending, I’ve come up with a fabulous new feature series – Hidden Treasures. I’ve asked the #RustCity authors to write a story, featuring any or all of their characters as they discover a new bit of treasure.

With that in mind, let’s see what hidden treasures Sara Dobie Bauer’s characters from Bite Somebody have discovered.


Vivian’s Boots: A Bite Somebody Short

Ian was on his usual morning bike ride—or more like race. Not literal, of course, as that morning he only raced against himself, but he had to prepare. He had an actual race that weekend, against hundreds of other people, that stretched all the way from one end of Admiral Key to the other, and he was going to win if only to impress Celia.

With the Florida sun beating on his forehead, his brain felt sort of melted and too warm, which got him thinking about how his body felt whenever Celia was around. They were a couple, officially, but he still sometimes caught her looking at him, staring really, as if she couldn’t believe a guy like Ian would love a girl like her.

Or, more accurately, a vampire like her.

She really didn’t get it. She seriously didn’t understand how sexy she looked in those yoga pants of hers or how her bright red hair made his pants feel much too tight. It was embarrassing really. What was he, fifteen? He was a full grown man, and yet, his vampire girlfriend really got his blood pumping.

He wondered if she noticed. Could vampires, like, hear heartbeats? Could they see the flow of blood beneath skin? He’d have to ask when he saw her that night.

Since it was Saturday, a lot of front yards on Admiral Key were full of junk. It was spring, so prime time for garage sales, before the humidity got too crazy along the Gulf. Ian usually ignored those sorts of things; he wasn’t much for clutter. Still, he stopped short when he passed a squat blue house by the side of the road. He stopped so quickly, his brakes squealed and he almost tumbled into a hibiscus bush.

The middle-aged lady handling the cash gave him a suspicious glare until she got a look at him. Then, she smiled. Even Ian could admit that being handsome had its perks.

“Hello,” she said, puffing away on a cigarette. Her skin looked like a baseball mitt from 1954.

Ian was too busy moving to stop and chat. His sneakers skidded to a halt in front of a table of shoes. On the very top were boots but not just any boots: thigh-high black pleather boots with a three-inch heel. “Whoa,” he whispered, picking one up.

The lady with the cigarette stepped up to his side, looked him up and down, and said, “It takes all sorts.”

The boots were practically identical to the ones Julia Roberts wore in Pretty Woman, Celia’s favorite movie. Hell, Ian thought they might be the actual boots, the resemblance was that strong. He didn’t know Celia’s shoe size. They’d only been making out for a week. He didn’t know if she’d even wear the things, but he had to buy them for her if only to let her know how beautiful he thought she was—how much like Vivian from the movie.

A beautiful woman with a heart of gold.

Ian brushed his sweaty black curls back from his forehead. “How much?”

“Honey, if you have the guts to wear ‘em, you can have those puppies for free.” The older lady elbowed him and wafted a cloud of smoke that made his blue eyes water. “There might even be some cocaine in the lining somewhere. Oh, the eighties.” She crossed herself and waddled to a worn out chair.

Ian took the Pretty Woman boots and hung them around his neck before climbing back on his bike and riding home to the Sleeping Gull Apartments. He couldn’t wait to make Celia smile. He loved when she smiled.


If you haven’t read Bite Somebody already, what the hell? Read it, dude, because Bite Somebody Else comes out June 20th, and you don’t want to be the only person who doesn’t understand the inside jokes. (Ralph.) Buy both books NOW at the World Weaver Press website.

Sara Dobie Bauer · Writing

I needed help being a sexy mom

When I saw the Cwtch Press anthology call for stories featuring erotic moms, I thought, “I should write something!” I have no idea why.

Let’s face it: I’m not a mom. I don’t have children. Yes, I have dogs, but I have no idea how to be an actual mother. I don’t know what it’s like to be pregnant or give birth. I respect women who are moms, but I could never do it. I’d be a horrible parent, because I would realistically have to say things like, “What do you mean, I can’t tase my kid?”

And yet, I did write a story about a lonely mom who’s just given birth to her first baby and happens to develop an obsessive crush on her UPS man.

“I Need Your Package” is fun, sort of silly, and sexy … but the first draft was wrong. As I said, I don’t know what a woman’s body feels like post-pregnancy. I needed experts.

I owe so much to my first readers all the time but for this story in particular. I had a couple real life moms who read “I Need Your Package,” told me everything that was wrong with it, and told me how to fix it. I won’t name you gals here because you might not wanna be associated with my smutty self, but you know who you are, and I ADORE YOU. You are the super heroes. You’re selfless and loving and much stronger than I will ever be.

In homage to Mother’s Day, here’s a teaser from my short story, featured in the If Mom’s Happy anthology from Cwtch Press. Buy your copy HERE today. A mom in your life will thank you!

Excerpt from “I Need Your Package”
By Sara Dobie Bauer
Featured in If Mom’s Happy (Cwtch Press)

Hannah once saw her deliveryman carry a big screen television under one arm. Another time, it was a dining room table from IKEA. You’d never guess, looking at the guy. He was tall and slim but not bulging. His long appendages probably helped, as did his sense of balance. He could stand on one foot like a yogi in tree pose—big box leaned on top of his thigh, scanner in the other. Like a ballet dancer, he jumped off porches and back into his big, brown truck. Hannah could hear that truck coming from three blocks away.

Dayton usually stopped at Hannah’s house around 11 AM. At 10:30, she successfully coaxed the baby into a nap. She made sure her blonde hair was in a respectable ponytail. Changing out of her robe, she put on a sweater that flared at the waist and jeans that didn’t look too “Mommy.”

If only she were so in tune with her own child.

Baby Neely had been mostly her husband’s idea. They’d discussed having children early in their marriage, but their careers got in the way. Hannah reviewed books for a mainstream women’s website; her husband worked early hours, often on the road. Then, at the age of thirty-six, it just sort of happened. Neely happened.

Hannah heard the rumble of Dayton’s truck and felt the way the sound vibrated in her chest. She scampered to the door and pulled it open, its old hinges squeaking just enough to wake Neely, who started wailing upstairs.

“Shit,” she whispered but pasted on a smile when Dayton jumped gracefully onto her porch with three separate yellow envelopes under his arm.

“Good morning, Hannah.” He winked one of his hazel eyes.

“Morning.” She gawked up at him and hoped her irises weren’t in the shape of hearts.

The scanner beeped as he ran it over the label of each individually wrapped book from publishers who desperately wanted her opinion. “Did you want me to f*** you on the porch next time?”

Her hand flew to her chest. “I’m sorry?”

“Did you want me to leave these on the porch next time? I don’t want to wake the baby.” The late autumn sun reflected off his short, auburn hair. His presence mimicked the fallen leaves in her front yard: those green-gold eyes, hair almost red, and slim fitting brown uniform.

“No, it’s fine. She just needs to be fed.”

“Oh, right.”

Did he glance down at her chest? Hannah had the urge to grab the back of his head and shove his face against her breasts. Then again, how sexy was a padded nursing bra?

“Well.” He handed her the packages. “See you later.” His smile was crooked and went up much higher on the right than left.

Hannah watched him go. Well, she watched his ass go until he hopped into the front seat of his truck and turned the ignition …


To read the rest (and learn more about Dayton … meow), buy your copy of If Mom’s Happy today and celebrate Mother’s Day with some sexy stories. Click HERE to purchase, and much love to all the hard-working moms out there!

Bite Somebody · Bite Somebody Else · Sara Dobie Bauer

The Bite Somebody Else Pilgrimage

I spent last week with my crazy family down in Longboat Key, Florida—the real life setting for my Bite Somebody series. This pilgrimage has been going on in the Dobie-Schwind clan since I was a little kid, although I’ve only partaken in the trip (usually alone with my Aunt Susie) for the past five years.

It is a week filled with decadent drinking and eating, silly stories about sex, tumbles in the waves, and shameless flirting with strange beach boys. For Susie and me, it’s a time to laugh and grow closer. It is a time to unwind and leave worries behind for a bit.

(You can read about my first year on Longboat with Susie HERE. It’s funny to think I had no idea that trip would change my career and my life.)

Something about being in Longboat inspired Bite Somebody years ago. I don’t remember the exact moment of conception, but I assume I was laying on the beach, making up stories in my head (like I always do), and awkward vampires in Florida just sort of happened—along with a cute, black-haired surfer boy named Ian. And Imogene, of course. Imogene, who I closely resemble during the annual visit to Longboat Key.

This year, I spent time on the beach reading over my review copy of Bite Somebody Else, the second and final book in the series. It is Imogene’s love story, although Ian and Celia are obviously still big parts of her story. She couldn’t survive without them, after all.

When not reading, I walked the beach. I wandered past the Little Gull Cottages, the real life basis for the Sleeping Gull Apartments in my books. Each night, I put on a tiny dress and high heels and wandered familiar locales from the Bite Somebody series, like St. Armand’s Circle, the Daiquiri Deck, Café L’Europe, and (perhaps most famously) the Drift Inn.

When I visit these places, I often tell the owners “I wrote a book about Longboat.” At Café L’Europe, the handsome maître d’ offered to buy me a drink. At Drift Inn, I asked about Angry Santa (David) and was saddened to hear he was in the hospital with pneumonia. I miraculously sold three copies of Bite Somebody to people who went on their phones and ordered a copy on the spot.

And yet there was something a bit melancholy hidden along the edges of my alcohol-fueled, sun-spattered euphoria.

For my aunt and my mom, Longboat Key always makes them cry a little because it reminds them of my grandparents, now gone. Susie even once saw something like a ghost on the beach at sunset—my Grandpa Schwind in his big hat, waving at her. When we scattered my grandma’s ashes, a green flash lit the beach as the sun went down and a bagpipe player played “Amazing Grace.”

Susie and me at The Drift Inn.

Although Longboat doesn’t remind me as much of my grandparents, it does remind me of Celia, Ian, Imogene, and now, Nicholas. It reminds me of their adventures and their love. It reminds me of writing two ridiculous, wonderful books about Longboat Key—books that encompass the perpetual joy and hilarity of my trips down south. However, this year, I was also reminded that … the series is over.

As of June 20, 2017, Imogene’s story will be released. Bite Somebody Else will leap into the world, fangs bared, and there won’t be another. This makes me take pause. Makes me want to do it all over, really, start from the beginning, write these characters and fall in love with them again. Go back to the Longboat Key of my vampire pals!

I call my yearly trip to Florida the Bite Somebody Pilgrimage, and I think I always will. Whereas my mom and aunt harbor memories of their parents, I will always walk the beach with memories of my fictional friends and a dream come true: the publication of my first novel, my first series.

In Bite Somebody, Imogene explains love to Celia through the lyrics of a song:

“It was about this guy who was looking for love and then he met this girl—this one girl. And the chorus was something about ‘I never knew it could be this easy.’” She shrugged. “I think that’s what happens when people are supposed to be together.”

It has been so easy (and fun) being the marionette behind the Bite Somebody series. As I move toward promotion and June launch parties for Bite Somebody Else, I realize how lucky I am to have found Celia and Imogene, to have found my editor Trysh and publisher Sarena at World Weaver Press, and how easy it is to lose myself in Longboat Key.

Even though this series might be coming to a close, nothing else is. I’ll keep writing and having fun. Next April, I’ll be in Longboat again, and I’ll drink rum punches with the same panache. I’ll remember my first book and all my colorful characters, because the imagination lives on and great memories stay with us forever.

Pre-order your copy of Bite Somebody Else HERE.

Bite Somebody Else · Sara Dobie Bauer

Bite Somebody Else Cover Reveal

The much anticipated book two in the Bite Somebody series is Imogene’s story, so of course, Imogene had to be on the cover. It’s been generally acknowledged that Imogene looks a lot like me, so when the cover artist asked for a description of my lovable (albeit twisted) female lead, I sent her this, from a photo shoot I did with photographer Chris Loomis:

Add some animation magic and the artistic acumen of Amanda C. Davis, and you get the Bite Somebody Else cover, revealed … in a moment. First, here’s a little bit about the book.

Imogene helped her newbie vampire friend Celia hook up with an adorable human, but now Celia has dropped an atomic bomb of surprise: she has a possibly blood-sucking baby on the way. Imogene is not pleased, especially when a mysterious, ancient, and annoyingly gorgeous vampire historian shows up to monitor Celia’s unprecedented pregnancy.
 
Lord Nicholas Christopher Cuthbert III is everything Imogene hates: posh, mannerly, and totally uninterested in her. Plus, she thinks he’s hiding something. So what if he smells like a fresh garden and looks like a rich boarding school kid just begging to be debauched? Imogene has self-control. Or something.
 
As Celia’s pregnancy progresses at a freakishly fast pace, Imogene and Nicholas play an ever-escalating game of will they or won’t they, until his sexy maker shows up on Admiral Key, forcing Nicholas to reveal his true intentions toward Celia’s soon-to-arrive infant.

Have I teased you enough? Okay, fine!!!!!!! Drum roll …

THERE SHE IS!! IMOGENE!!!! She’s perfect!!!!

For a little something extra, there’s a brand new Bite Somebody Else excerpt on the World Weaver Press website. Read more about Imogene and Nicholas HERE.  And while you’re there, you  might as well pre-order your paperback copy of Bite Somebody Else today!!

The book doesn’t hit shelves until June 20th, but I’m already thrilled to unleash Imogene on the world again (as well as Celia and Ian, of course). I’m also thrilled for you to meet Nicholas. Happy Hump Day! And don’t forget, #Imogene4Life.